Hey, I haven’t seen you since last year! ahahahaaaa, not funny Dad joke out of the way… on with the article!
Something which I began a few years ago, is instead of creating New Years resolutions, I create self love goals for each month. Each month helps me to focus on myself and bettering myself and just improving my general wellbeing. Each month usually has a particular theme which I abide to, but this year I’ve decided to set myself some main challenges for the whole of the year, and editing and adding them each month to fit with what my focus is. I have twelve main goals for 2021 to help me embrace different things in my life, and they are just overall factors which I wish to improve on. So, without further ado, these are my twelve goals for 2021! ~ Tati xxx
- Do more of what I love, even if that means I have to say no to people. Something very important which I learnt from therapy is that it’s okay to be selfish, as long as you are protecting yourself. I have a bad habit of being a people pleaser, something which is often detrimental to my wellbeing. This year, I am going to focus on saying no and being more honest with those around me. If they don’t understand I need to take time for myself, then I don’t need them in my life quite simply!
- Keep up on the physical aspects of self care. I am slowly getting to grips with the mental aspects of self love, but I find myself often forgetting that physical care is also important. Ensuring that I relax, don’t spend too much time on technology, even taking care of my skin and hair, are all vital parts of self care and this year I will be spending time on each of these things.
- Keeping fit and healthy. Something I found when I was really struggling with depression in 2018 was that I often couldn’t bring myself to leave the house, but exercise was very good for me. My boyfriend is a bit of a fitness freak and he is constantly encouraging me to get my endorphins going by doing cardio and going to the gym. It makes me feel a lot better even if I’m simply walking somewhere instead of driving, getting out the house or even on those days where I really need to stay in, just opening the curtains and letting in those rays, opening the window to breathe in the air! It helps a lot and I’m planning on doing a lot more of it this year.
- Really dive into and focus on my schoolwork. At times, I used to feel completely isolated from others, abandoned by my friends, rumours flying left right and centre, it often felt like I was alone. At times like this I began coming to terms with the fact that the one thing which would never leave me was my career and hard work. This year I am on a mission to kick ass on my AS levels, even though “Ms Rona” [as my friend calls it] has her own plans! No matter what, this year school work and getting the grades is one of my priorities and it’s definitely a helpful one to possess!
- Finding (and keeping to) that healthy balance of school, family, friends, a social life, volunteering, work, relationships and having time for myself! I’ve spent so long trying to work out how to do this, and I think I am finally getting there. I have worked out that timetables work well for me during revision time and organisation is one of the best ways which I can balance everything, seeing it all right in front of me instead of just in my head really helps! This year I am going to do this all 365 days! If I control my own life then nothing can be too bad!
- Stop worrying about what others think of you! I got part of the way there in 2020 but I will master this in 2021! It’s all about self-confidence and staying true to myself, no matter how crazy ‘myself’ is! I’ll get there in the end, it’s all about practice, it seems.
- Dance and sing more! I really want to start doing this again and I am so happy I decided to continue with performing arts! I have started singing again and I am slowly getting back onto the dancing scene which is super exciting! I find it all super calming but also freeing and it lets my creativity go nuts!
- Accept the past, but don’t ever use it as an excuse for your actions. This is more just continuing to work on the foundations which I made last year. I have accepted that shitty things have happened to me and I am now slowly moving forwards. I will try my hardest nonetheless and I will definitely manage it all at some point and I’ll be stronger than ever!
- Cut out all types of toxicity: friendships, relationships, unhealthy foods, contacts, just everything! I am getting a lot better at seeing the red flags which is very good. However, I still have a bit of way to go. This year, I am sure I will work my way through it all which is a very good thing. Working out what positively and negatively impacts my life is a difficult thing at first, but I have been getting a lot better at it and I feel that with some practice, I can live my best toxic-free life!
- Read more – expand horizons! I don’t just mean books, I mean any form of literature! The news, magazines, books, tabloids, novels, comics, you name it, it will help me become a better and more well-rounded person which is very good!
- Reflection is a good thing. I enjoy tracking my mood and habits as it shows me how I’m doing. I reflect on the past day, past week, the past month, gosh, even the past year! It shows me self-improvement but also self-acceptance. It helps me keep on top of both healthy and unhealthy habits too, while giving me potential reasoning about causes for certain moods and emotions. It’s a very systematic and logical which I enjoy and it’s helpful to me as well!
- Take more photos! Something I need to do more is take more photos when I go out. It will help me to focus and appreciate the beauty of everything outside the house. Plus, I really enjoy it so – added bonus!!